I have been reading a very encouraging book, Stop Saying You're Fine; Discover a More Powerful You by Mel Robbins. I sought this book out after being directed to a YouTube hosted video entitled; "How to Stop Screwing Yourself Over" also by Mel Robbins.
A. The Rule of Right Now
While working through the first chapter I have discovered the beauty and effectiveness of right now. In short; don't put off the little things, do what you ought to do now. Delaying just means you are waiting to talk yourself out of action. Little things become big things. The more we are victorious in doing what needs done right away the easier it is to take action next time.
A quick tidying of the front room takes less than five minutes, I have been guilty of putting it off for half the day telling myself, "I will do it in just a minute." While it nags at me, driving me nutty and adding one more little thing on the pile of irritations. In applying the Right Now rule when I think of it as I'm walking by I'll turn around and pick up the front room. Less than five minutes and one less thing I have to think about, one less thing to stress over because it's done, one less item niggling at my ability to focus on the big stuff.
I have found the more I look after the little things immediately; the less stressed I am, the tidier our home is, the fewer times I find myself dreaming of a beach vacation. Well, I still dream of a beach vacation but occasionally I think of taking my family with me. Ha!
B. Chicken or Jerk
Also in the first chapter Mel talks about Chickens and Jerks. In stifling our desires and delaying action we force ourselves into one of two mindsets. Chickens tell themselves that can't do things because something will just go wrong, someone will be mad, something always gets in the way etc
Jerks have a running dialogue which includes blame. The world is out the get the Jerk. Every problem, struggle, hardship is because someone, often very mystical "they", prevents them from succeeding. Their spouse is too selfish, the bank won't give 'em money, the boss won't give a raise, the kids are impossible, the weight is just too hard to take off, their illness is really just worse than anyone else's. ever. blah blah blah, whine, etc
C. Reality Check
You make you life what it is. Money, health, spouse, kids all work as you let them. No you can't will one million dollars into your account but you can take control of the money you do have. Nope your children (teens) will not suddenly think you are Mrs. or Mr. Wonderful, No way can your force of will melt the fat or instantly heal your chronic illness. BUT taking action right now over what you can control has the power to shift your focus and mindset. Do what you can do immediately about your finances; stop over spending, live within your means, apply for a new job (or even a second job). Overweight? Research what may truly be a healthy diet for you and apply it, stop eating crap, go for a walk, drink water, Kids driving you batty? Take 'em with you, walks are good for everyone, sit down and listen to them, don't fix their problems, listen. Unhappy with your job (or lack of)? Determine to apply to one new job everyday even if you don't think you could get it. You may be pleasantly surprised!
The very actions you take can spur you on toward more action, a greater ability to achieve your goal. As a very large woman every time I take a brisk walk I am one step closer to fitness, every time I say, "no thanks" to a diet coke, fries, cookie whatever, I am one step closer to a healthy relationship with food and a healthier well balanced me.
4. YES!
Each time I do what I know I should do, the moment I should do it I am building momentum for the next yes. Yes, I would love to go for a walk to rebuild my health. Yes, I will take a moment and call the friend who needs some encouragement. Yes, I will discipline my child for back talk instead of letting it go. Yes, I can drink water instead of coke, juice, whatever. Yes, I will be sure to pick up the front room so it won't nag at me all day. Yes.
Points for anyone who noticed the A, B, C, 4. A Mad About You reference purely for my own amusement. ~ Lyric
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